Why Does Your Girlfriend Call You "Daddy?" What She Means and How to Respond (2024)

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Co-authored byTara Vossenkemper, PhD, LPCand Eric McClure

Last Updated: July 20, 2022Fact Checked

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   She likes you and feels safe around you. Generally speaking, dads tend to be caring, loving, and protective. Calling you “daddy” implies that you’re all of these things for her! It’s a good thing, and she’s doing this because she’s comfortable around you, so don’t assume there’s something problematic going on here. She’s not literally saying you’re her father!^[1]

   • While “daddy” often means “father,” people also use it casually as a synonym for “boss,” “protector,” or “provider.” She is 100% using “daddy” to mean the latter here.
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   She likes how strong and authoritative you are. Regardless of whether it’s true or not, dads have a stereotype for being the “stronger” parent in a hetero-normative relationship. Dads are also known for being “tougher” on children than mothers are. She may be calling you daddy to signal that she thinks you’re the dominant person in the relationship, which probably appeals to her.^[2]

   • Some people like being the “follower” in a relationship. They like the comfort and security of feeling like someone else is taking the lead. Even if it doesn’t really make sense to you, it makes sense to her!

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   It might turn her on. If she says this when the two of you are getting intimate, it's probably a turn-on for her. A lot of people like it when their partner is in charge in bed. If she likes it when you take the lead, she might like being more submissive when you're hooking up.^[3]

   See Also

   Papi - Baby name meaning, origin, and popularityPapi slang word | Learn English10 Original and Lovely Mexican Terms of EndearmentTop 20 Spanish Nicknames for Family, Lovers, and Friends

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   Nope, it shouldn’t be anything to worry about. "Daddy" is becoming more and more common of a pet name, and it's not unusual for women to use it to refer to their partners. There’s a cliché out there that women who call their partner “daddy” have daddy issues, but that’s really not necessarily the case. A lot of women just like it as a pet name!^[4]

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   Your girlfriend calling you "daddy” might be a green flag if you think about it! A lot of people feel like a hero when they “protect” their girlfriend, and one of a dad’s main responsibilities is to protect their children. If your girlfriend calls you daddy, she’s signaling that you’re keeping her safe and happy. From that perspective, the fact that she’s trying to make you feel good about protecting her is a sign that she really cares about you.^[5]

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   The use of pet names in general is considered a good sign in a relationship. Professional therapists, counselors, and psychologists all generally agree that pet names are a sign of a healthy, functional relationship.^[6] While your girlfriend’s choice in the pet name department may strike you as odd, it’s a good sign that she’s using them at all.^[7]

   • If everything else is going well in the relationship, you have nothing to worry about here. It’s just one of her little quirks!

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1. “Babe” and “baby” are both safe options. "Babe" and "baby" are popular pet names for couples, and they can be used to lean into the dominant/submissive aspect of a relationship if you're into it (even if you're not, they're still a safe bet!). You could also go with something like “cutie” or “sweetie” if you prefer.^[8]

   • Your best bet is always to ask your girlfriend what pet names she likes. She might like "babe" or "baby," or she might prefer something else. Find out what she likes!

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1. If you don’t like “daddy,” ask her to pick a new nickname. If you don’t like it when she calls you daddy, feel free to tell her. It’s very unlikely that she’ll have a problem picking a new nickname for you, and she'll probably understand where you’re coming from if you approach the conversation politely.^[9]

   • You might just say, “Hey, I love that you’re so affectionate with me, but I’m not the biggest fan of you calling me daddy. I know you mean well, and it’s sweet, but it’s not for me. Any way you could find a new pet name for me?”
   • Always use "I" language when addressing a conflict with your partner. That helps prevent them from feeling defensive.^[10]
   • If she’s doing it ironically because it makes you uncomfortable and this is a kind of running joke between you two, you can fight fire with fire by calling her “daughter” or “son.” That might be good for a laugh and get her to cut it out.

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